The Aftermath – Part 2

Parts 1, 3, 4, 5

When we became permanent residents, the French laws came crashing down on my daughter. They forced her out of the English school system even though I had been told by three different provincial sources before enrolling her in any school that she would be able to remain in the English school system once we became permanent residents. This became a four month battle of trying to get her confirmed in the French school I had chosen. Let me say that again. FOUR MONTHS just to get her confirmed in the school I had chosen. The difficulty I had in getting anyone, and I mean anyone, the school principle or vice-principle, or someone from the French School System to return my calls was impossible. No one would talk to me until I finally had the pretender call the school principle. Why is it they would listen to a deep stern male voice over my pissed off female voice is beyond me, but that is the way of the world. As much as people think male dominance shouldn’t be around anymore, the world revolves around it. People just don’t respond the same to a woman’s voice as they do a male dominant voice.

This may sound like not all that much to be stressed over, however take into consideration that I lived in a foreign country, had no friends, other than the one I had just met, I was a single parent of a two year old going on three who was starting into what people loved to refer to as the terrible two’s stage, no car, and no daycare.

I did eventually find daycare a couple months after the move which suddenly turned into a nightmare when they failed their inspection and lost their government subsidy. I would have to pay full daycare fees or take her out of daycare and face paying an in-home sitter again. I guess the universe finally had pity on me and almost in the same day I received a call from a Garderie (French daycare) nearby which I had emailed sometime back when I was looking for a daycare after moving. They had suddenly found themselves with an unexpected opening and wondered if I was interested.

I jumped at this chance and was in luck that I didn’t have to wait the normal two or three weeks to switch her from the in-home run daycare to the Garderie.

Then I was slammed from work with a new edict coming down from management stating I would need to return to working from the office building downtown. This added thirty minutes in the morning and thirty minutes each evening on travel time between work and home. I had no vehicle so I had to use the metro. Just leaving the house to do anything was becoming so stressful I found myself running to the bathroom three or four times before even walking out the door. My nerves have always effected my digestive system, with the stress I was under my digestive system was constantly under bombardment.

Then my back problems returned because I wasn’t seeing a chiropractor. I finally made an appointment with the one my US chiropractor recommended and started seeing him. Due to his location it took me thirty minutes to get to him from my new apartment. But he was a life saver. He didn’t just treat my alignment problems but he helped me to understand some of the emotional stress I was under in regards to the pretender who was still attempting to weasel his way back into my life.

He also saw the stress I was under just living in Montreal, and was there to witness the difficulties with my daughter’s enrollment in the French School system. Within two months out of the four months it took to get her enrolled, I had finally had enough. I looked at all the problems I was facing if we continued to live in Quebec Province and finally stopped denying what all the signs were telling me.

I decided to move out of Quebec Province. Now I had another decision to make, and that was where we would move. I could return to the states but that created a whole other slew of stresses to deal with and I decided for now that wouldn’t be an option. I started researching all the different Provinces. I looked at all the red tape regarding my daughter and school. I had decided to not immunize her, so I checked for any red tape regarding enrolling her in school even though federally Canada supported a parents decision to not immunize their children, Provincially some required parents to sign papers of waver stating they refused to immunize their children. I was set to avoid as much red tape as possible, so any Province requiring any paperwork other than to just inform the school that she was not immunized, I discarded immediately. I created a Pros and Cons list of the remaining Provinces and went to work looking up all I could for each of them.

In the end British Columbia had the most Pros and least Cons. I then researched how much it would cost us to move. Then I set a budget and determined in one year I would have the funds to move and I set my budget and lived by it. Exactly a year later, we moved.

I had started in January trying to get my daughter enrolled in school. It was the end of February, beginning of March when I finally admitted we needed to move. In April was when I finally received confirmation that my daughter was accepted in the school we had chosen.

The last day of March the following year, we boarded an airplane for British Columbia. I generally get nervous flying, not flying itself, just the process of arriving on time, getting checked in and to our gate on time is nerve wracking to me, but this time it wasn’t. We were finally leaving a place that was making me physically ill and wearing me down.

My daughter had started having her own stomach problems with how the teachers treated her in the French school. So for us both, and my daughter’s first time flying, this was a piece of cake. A new adventure we both looked at with excitement. She never complained once about the lines, the waiting between flights or the length of time we had to sit in a plane getting to our destination. The only complaint she had was her ears hurting when we came down after flying over the mountains. It was such a quick descent her ears had trouble adjusting. I had gum on hand and showed her how to gently adjust the pressure in her ears but it was still painful for her and they didn’t ease up until a few hours after being on the ground.

We had to rent a car once we landed since I didn’t have one and my first week was spent purchasing a car. Our belongings wouldn’t arrive for thirty days, but our new landlord was the best. She provided us an air mattress, bedding, kitchen cookware and utensils and anything else we needed that we couldn’t buy. I rented a TV and had shipped my daughter’s xbox with some games ahead of time so she would have something she enjoyed playing since she only had a couple of her toys she could pack and bring with her.


About Kate Spyder

I'm a creative individual finding her way in her writing. I enjoy expressing my deep thoughts through poetry and stories. I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoy writing them.
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