I had two appointments today. The first was pre-op explaining what I need to do the day before surgery and the morning of surgery and then the care of the drain after surgery. Most of the instructions are very simple. I have already stopped all my vitamins and supplements, although I added curcumin back in since it helps manage my pain. I take it when I need it and I needed it yesterday.
After my pre-op appointment I went to the breast clinic to see if my surgeon would fill out the paperwork for my time away from work recovering. I was told she does not fill those out and to take it to my family doctor who will charge me for the time it takes to fill it out. The woman who told me this asked me if I was okay and though I felt okay, she could see my frustration so she took me to a quiet room so we could sit and talk. I told her I’m not worried so much about the surgery as I am about how I’ll be able to handle things after surgery and just trying to coordinate things. She understood, and reassured me that my friend staying until the Saturday following my surgery would be plenty of time. By then I’ll be able to be up and around and be able to take care of myself, my basic needs and simple things. And my daughter will be able to help with the rest. The hardest time she said is the first twenty-four hours because I’ll be really tired. She then went with me to neuclear medicine and explained to them that if my friend flew in on Tuesday that I might be a little late for the appointment. They said to just be there by 2pm so this would give me some extra time if I need it to pick up my friend from the airport.
Then I was almost to my Naturopath’s clinic when someone rear-ended me. Luckily it was in stop and go traffic and I had just come to a complete stop and they were not going very fast. No one was hurt, and when I first took a look at my back bumper I didn’t think there was any damage until I looked at where the bumper wrapped around to the side. It had separated from the body of the car. We exchanged the necessary paperwork. I went to my Naturopath appointment and then went home.
At home, I made the necessary calls to file the claim. The couple in the car wanted to settle privately but with everything I have on my plate I just couldn’t. I couldn’t have the worry of trying to deal with them along with the surgery and getting the car repaired. And tonight is a good example as to why. I started going into full anxiety mode, feeling jittery and just feeling like I wasn’t going to be able to handle all of this. I know high stress gobbles up our hormones and in my case, my progesterone. Anxiety and panic attacks are what happen when my progesterone gets really low. I have small tablets of progesterone to take when this happens so I can supplement my usual daily dose. I took some tonight. I feel some relief. Hopefully it will be enough.
I just feel like I’m walking a tight wire. I know there isn’t anything anyone can do. There are things I need to do. No one else can do them because it requires me, whether it is me filling out the papers, or scheduling the appointment with the doctor for him to fill out the form, or talking to car insurance companies, or going to the appointments. About the only thing that might help would be hiring someone to come clean my house, and wash my bedding. One of the instructions is the night before put clean sheets on the bed. I can’t believe I don’t have any extra sheets in the house, so this means stripping the bed and washing them so I can put them back on the bed. I just never had a need to have an additional set.
Probably the best thing for me right now is to try and get some sleep. I’ve come down off the stress which means I’ll be crashing soon. Tomorrow is another day.