I should be thrilled about buying a house. But, I’m not. I should be excited about the prospect of living in my own home and no longer renting. But, I’m not. I’m trying to get a handle on why. But, I’m not finding the handle to grasp.
I keep telling myself the excitement will come. However, all I see before me is the work to do for yet another move. I have moved at least a total of ten times since graduating high school and moving out on my own. This will make number eleven. That is approximately, one move every 3.36 years.
No wonder, the thought of moving just exhausts me. I look at everything around me and all I see is work. Tomorrow, I have a moving company coming to give me an estimate for the whole package, packing everything for me and moving it all. As long as there isn’t anything heavy for me to lift a few things can be left behind for me to move on my own, like plants, and cleaning supplies for obvious reasons. But for the most part I want them to do everything. I’ll find out tomorrow just how much they will do and how much it will cost.
On the other hand, I need to make this place presentable for possible renters. Those who know me know how much I dislike housework. Maybe once I am past all of this the excitement will set in, but for now, I’m trying hard to just take one day at a time and get a bit done every day, even so though, I find myself procrastinating, which means I’ll probably end up in a flurry of activity trying to get it all done at once. It is hard not to be disappointed in myself when I do things like this.
I have to put an end to my procrastination. Tomorrow begins the effort to get this place in shape. It will be listed within the next couple of days for rent and even though we will be working towards moving sometime within a few days following August 6th, we will need to ensure it is presentable to those interested in renting.
This will also see the beginning of changes for my daughter and me. Having a place with the room we need will mean I can buy what I need to keep our home organized. It will take a while to get things the way we want them but we will get there and I hope my daughter will be onboard with me in keeping our home organized. I’m not obsessed about neatness, but I do want to feel good inside when friends come over. It all seems so daunting and maybe this is why I’m feeling the way I am.